The Polyamory Breakup Book: Causes, prevention, and survival
Author: Kathy Labriola
Publication Date: October 4, 2019
Formats: Trade paperback, Kindle, ePub and PDF
ISBN: 978-1-944934-81-1 (paperback); 978-1-944934-82-8 (ePub); 978-1-944934-83-5 (Kindle); 978-1-944934-84-2 (PDF)
Polyamory is not always easy. With multiple partners often come more complex relationships to navigate. This practical guide looks at the common causes of polyamorous breakups, identifies strategies to avoid ending relationships, and provides you with the toolkit to survive a breakup.
Kathy Labriola uses real life examples and expert insight as a counselor and nurse. From how to handle jealousy to the practicalities of managing money and time with multiple partners, this book includes tips and insights from the polyamory community.
It is inevitable that some relationships will end in a breakup. This book helps you maintain friendships and minimize the impact of a breakup on the rest of your polycule and wider community. Unlike traditional breakup guides, Labriola’s book offers insight specific to the polyamory community and addresses the unique challenges that come with multiple partners.
“Using a detailed series of real-life examples of polyamory, Kathy Labriola dissects a variety of poly breakups and success stories to provide expert advice on how to navigate troubled times. This work is mandatory reading for those considering an adventure into the world of consensual non-monogamy.”
—Ken Haslam, MD, founder of the Ken Haslam Polyamory Archives, the Kinsey Institute, Indiana University
“A comprehensive, insightful and very useful book on a topic that receives too little attention. Highly recommended.”
—Jay Wiseman, author of SM 101: A Realistic Introduction
“The Polyamory Breakup Book is a much-needed how-to guide on navigating breakups in consensual non-monogamy. Despite the book’s hierarchical use of primary/secondary, it offers an excellent road map for breakup crisis control, even for us relationship anarchists. Kathy Labriola uses personal vignettes to illustrate stages of breakups, and provides deep-dives into incompatibility, jealousy, and survival post-breakup. Labriola offers prevention and crisis strategies that are helpful for people of any consensually non-monogamous configuration, so they can systematically assess their needs and preferences before crises strike. I found the post-break up public relations chapter particularly insightful, and timely. If people read this book long before breakups are on the horizon, transitions would be easier, harm would be reduced, and more relationships might be preserved.”
—Chrissy Holman, President of Open Love NY and Communications Lead, APA Division 44 CNM Task Force
“If you are looking for realistic and compassionate advice from a highly knowledgeable person who has been practicing polyamory and holds decades of experience serving clients in open relationships, The Polyamory Breakup Book is required reading. Because so many folks who try open relationships are making it up as they go along, with few role models and no maps for how to handle the challenges every relationship inevitably faces, there is a huge need for this book to help people figure out how to handle a poly breakup. And boy does Labriola deliver!
One of the things I find most valuable is Labriola’s continual reminders that it is not the duration or longevity of a relationship that makes it real, valuable, or successful. Rather, it is the quality of the relationship and the quality of life people experience in their relationships that are important. Reconfiguring assumptions and expectations to celebrate the relationship in the moment can help people enjoy a fantastic brief fling or a love affair lasting decades, and The Polyamory Breakup Book has the guidance to help readers do just that!”
“Kathy Labriola continues to share her decades of professional experience as a clinician working with polyamorous individuals in building healthy relationships and now navigating healthy breakups. There is an enormous need for this resource, and there is no other book like this on the market. I’m excited to be able to recommend this book to both my colleagues and clients.”
—Faith G. Harper, Phd, LPC-S, ACS, ACN
Kathy Labriola is a counselor and nurse in private practice in Berkeley, California. She is the author of The Jealousy Workbook and Love in Abundance and has years of professional experience working with polyamorous singles, couples, and groupings on relationship dynamics.